Exclaim!'s 2013 in Lists: 10 Worst Album Covers
Published Dec 23, 2013Obviously art is a very subjective and personal experience, and beauty is most definitely in the eye of the beholder. That said, taking a glance at some of the LP covers that arrived in 2013, we're left wondering if any musicians covered in Exclaim's Worst Album Covers list actually have any love for the eyesores they attached to their music.
Proving there's no real formula to making the list, this year's oddities included everything from artsy-fartsy photo shoots gone wrong to some of the most poorly produced, ill-thought out illustrations we've seen in some time. One thing's for sure, though: these covers all made us barf in our mouths a little. Enjoy!
Don't forget to head over to our 2013 in Lists section to see more of our Year-End coverage.
Worst Album Covers 2013:
Donkey Punch the Night
While, truly, we're glad Maynard James Keenan and co. kept things PG for Donkey Punch the Night's album cover, rather than serve up some truly NSFW art involving the sex move of the same name, who's the jackass that gave this the green light? To be fair, it looks like someone spent a little time drawing the hauntingly hideous hairy beast in question, but the two-second slopjob done on the typography basically barfed onto the canvas is a slap in the face to good taste.
9. Fleetwood Mac
Almost as turgid as that lazy, lazy EP title is the groan-worthy typography, stretched to ridiculous lengths across a chrome-coloured, rippling silk handkerchief. It's a subtler entry than most, but goes to show that the worst covers don't necessary have to be eye-popping to be awful.
8. R. Kelly
Black Panties (Special Edition)
An ultimately unused piece of cover art featuring a pair of black panties on a stark white background was apparently too on-the-nose for Kels to keep. Instead, he offered up two different pieces for the regular and deluxe editions of his latest R&B album. A sexualized symmetry is threaded into the first, with multiple bodies strewn around the singer. As you can see above, though, the deluxe edition has Kels going off the deep end with a twisted Phantom of the Opera theme, staring into the camera dead-on through a rhinestone half-mask while playing the naked torso of a woman like a cello. Judging by the lady's head-hiding display, she seems embarrassed by the photo shoot as much as the body-bowing skills of our man Kels.
7. The Polyphonic Spree
Yes, It's True
Thankfully, both the cover model's bangs-heavy hairdo and a strategically-placed, face-hugging butterfly saved her from having to realize how shoddy the psychedelic artwork for the Polyphonic Spree's latest LP actually was.
6. Small Black
Limits of Desire
The long-haired exhibitionists seen here have truly chosen the most impractical setup for their love hug, unless they're eventually aiming to have their genitals snapped up in the jaws of a hungry, hungry crocodile. Worst threesome ever.